Real talk.
I feel like a large part of my life has been spent trying to find where I fit in, feeling accepted or trying to find my “tribe”.
I was never the “popular” girl, I was always the last one to be picked in sports and I always walked to and from school alone. I was bullied at school and I grew up with an alcoholic and abusive parent, so I didn’t feel like I fit in at home either. The habits of trying to fit in by pretending to be interested in something that I really wasn’t, just to be “accepted”, carried on through my adulthood and even into my first marriage. I knew that I didn’t want to marry him, but I did anyway because “what will people think?” or “this is what I’m supposed to do at this age” or “I gotta get out of my house and this is my only way out”. Today I realized that part of me still looks for acceptance from other people because my feelings were hurt that I wasn’t invited to this “thing” and that I still have that “tribe” thing in my mind, especially being a mom – everyone says how you need a tribe. Guess what. No I don’t. Today was the day that I finally said – fuck this.
I’m thankful to have my little family that I can call my tribe. My husband is my ROCK and biggest supporter, my little girls gave me a purpose that I never knew existed in me and we don’t need excess. I don’t need to be invited to things or to be an after thought for anyone.
I’m writing this because I want other people that might feel the same way to know that you’re not alone. A lot of us feel this way and not everyone will like you or want to hang out with you – and that’s more than ok. Ain’t nobody got time for that, boo. Be fantastic with being YOU and spending quality time with yourself and those close to you. Stop chasing people that don’t want to be around you. Stop pretending to like things that they like just to BE liked. You’re not for everyone and everyone isn’t for you… and that is perfect.
Maxi Dress // Boots
