Life has a funny way of teaching us valuable lessons, sometimes in the most unexpected ways. For me, the turning point in my life came when I realized that my tolerance for alcohol was getting dangerously high. The fear of following in my father’s footsteps, who battled alcoholism, was a haunting shadow that spurred me to make a pivotal decision: to embrace sobriety. I’m determined to break the cycle of addiction for the sake of my own well-being and for the future of my children.
The Tipping Point
Growing up, I witnessed firsthand the devastating effects of alcoholism in my father’s life. His struggles left an indelible mark on me, and I vowed to never let alcohol become a destructive force in my own life. However, as the years passed and the pressures of adulthood and motherhood mounted, I found myself using alcohol as a crutch to cope with stress and anxiety. The social drink every now and then turned into having a glass of wine with every meal, or having a drink when I was in an uncomfortable situation that I couldn’t get out of and I found myself saying things like “if I have to do this, then I need to drink”…. That’s not normal behavior.
My wake-up call came when I began experiencing brown-outs – periods of time I couldn’t remember after drinking. It only happened once, but those brown-outs were terrifying, and I knew they were a dangerous sign that my relationship with alcohol was spiraling out of control. It was then that I realized I was on a perilous path, one that I had promised myself I would never tread.
Breaking the Cycle
The fear of perpetuating the cycle of addiction that had plagued my family for generations was a powerful motivator. I couldn’t bear the thought of my children witnessing the same painful descent into alcoholism that I had seen in my father. I knew I had to take control of my life and make a change for the better.
- Self-Reflection: I embarked on a journey of self-reflection to understand the root causes of my excessive drinking. Working it out through my plant medicine journey was crucial to making the decision to stop drinking altogether.
- Accountability: I confided in my closest friends and family about my decision to become sober. Having a support system in place was crucial, as it held me accountable for my actions and provided much-needed encouragement during challenging times.
- Establishing New Habits: To replace my old habits, I adopted healthier ones. I began exercising regularly, meditating, and engaging in creative pursuits that provided a positive outlet for my emotions.
Protecting My Legacy
One of my driving forces in maintaining sobriety is the desire to create a different legacy for my own children. I never want them to experience the pain and confusion I felt as a child witnessing my father’s struggles. Instead, I want to model a life filled with resilience, self-improvement, and healthy choices.
- Leading by Example: By staying sober, I hope to show my children that it’s possible to overcome challenges and make positive changes in one’s life. I want them to see that seeking help and taking control of your destiny is a sign of strength, not weakness.
- Open Communication: I’ve made it a priority to have open and honest conversations with my children about the dangers of alcohol and the importance of responsible choices. I want them to feel comfortable discussing their feelings and concerns with me.
- Providing a Safe Environment: I’ve created a safe and nurturing home environment that fosters emotional well-being and encourages healthy coping mechanisms. I believe that a stable home is crucial in continuing open conversations with our kids and being able to address any concern that should arise as they grow up.
My journey to sobriety has been filled with challenges, but it has also been incredibly rewarding. By confronting my own demons and making the conscious choice to break the cycle of addiction, I am not only protecting myself but also creating a brighter future for my children. Every day, I am reminded of the power of determination and the resilience of the human spirit. I hope that by sharing my story, I can inspire others who may be facing similar struggles to find the strength to change and build a life free from the shadows of addiction.
